User:Loney 97

The Beginning Hello there and welcome to my slightly random, slightly illegible userpage. Be forewarned that you may encounter great swathes of weird trivia, strange statements and a whole lot of hipster cats and Danbo (once I actually get around to adding them in.) Did you know that "cellar door" is considered one of the most euphonic phrases in the English language in terms of sound combination? You do now.

I'm Loney, which is a conspicuous fact I am sure you did not already know but regardless, now that you've read it again I'm sure it will stick in your retentive mind much better. The 97 doesn't mean much, but if you strained your brain a bit you could probably figure out where I came up with that number; and no, it has nothing to do with the 25th prime number or the percentage of earth's salt water that is located in our oceans. So, my name is Loney, my friends call me Loney, Forever Alone, Sailor, Loners, Oney and assorted other nicknames, my enemies don't call me anything because I don't have any enemies (Save this guy,  that guy, and especially  this air-headed cretin) and I call myself Whatever. I. Want.

The Muddle This, dear readers, is the muddle. And no, it's not called a muddle because I just threw everything in here, or because today is Tuesday (although I did rather just throw everything in here, and today is Tuesday). This is the muddle because every good piece of writing has a Beginning, a Muddle, and a End, and why should my fustian little userpage do any less?

I am not much more than a typical resident of this place, although really, could any one of the members here ever be considered typical? Probably not. I'm a bit droll compared to some of their tennis-TF2-MLP-saturated apparatuses; at times it feels like my knowledge and superior mentality stick out around here like a screen door on a submarine, but, regardless of my manifest superincumbent cognizance you're still here, reading this page, so obviously you still care to find out what idiotic rampages take place in my mind.

Despite my unremarkable competence I have developed more then a few close relationships with various members and persons of this dear diminutive community, and because of my beloved ties to these astute individuals I have taken the liberty of listing the names of these companions, comrades, cohorts, colleagues, confederates and collaborators of mine in alphabetical order below, each with a small biographical account of their distinct livelihood.

Aravis Aravis is the oldest of my two beautiful daughters. Adopted along with her younger sister by me and my older brother Talmid, who took the place of an uncle in the two girls' lives, she now resides in Kanadia. Along with many other things, she likes butterflies, the colour purple, and MLP (who doesn't)?

Arya Arya is the younger of my two amazing daughters, and although we don't have all that much in common we share a special father-daughter relationship that I love :3 She likes anime, music... and I'll still have to add more about her later.

BCG BusyCityGuy, though not of any actual relation to me, still looks up to me as a fatherly figure in his life. He is a well-apt, capable young man, but is known to steal the car keys on occasion.

Boyo A resident of Kanadia also, Boyo (though now heralded as Link Celestrial) is a good friend to both me and my two daughters.

Chicago <font face="Calibri" color="Black" size="3px">One of my random, prodigious friends on here, Chicago like turtles, trains, and a ton of other things I don't even know.

<font face="Calligraffitti" color="Teal" size="5px">Galileo <font face="Calibri" color="Black" size="3px">Galileo, one of my philosopher-astronomer aquaintances along with Keplers, is another of my incidental, admirable friends on here.

<font face="Reenie Beanie" color="Midnightblue" size="5px">Harry <font face="Calibri" color="Black" size="3px">Harry is a dapper, debonair young bachelor who likes to spend his time throwing fundraising parties and going for long moonlit walks on the beach. Some of his many hobbies include singing and driving around in convertibles with the top down.

<font face="Calligraffitti" color="Indigo" size="5px">Indi <font face="Calibri" color="Black" size="3px">Indigo is a young girl who spends her time wandering around bookstores and wolf sanctuaries and sleeping in her treehouse, which is a quiet haven for her whenever chaos breaks out in chat.

<font face="Reenie Beanie" color="Darkslategrey" size="5px">Peat <font face="Calibri" color="Black" size="3px">A friend of mine since my first days on this wiki, she's probably the reason I even bothered staying. Thanks to her, I've now wasted a year and a half of my life on here, how could I not add to the list?

<font face="Reenie Beanie" color="Steelblue" size="5px">Riol <font face="Calibri" color="Black" size="3px">Riolu dahling is my tennis-and-Pokemon-playing soulmate, and we were "happily" wed on February 28, 2014 (or somewhere around there).

<font face="Calligraffitti" color="Teal" size="5px">Swipester-kun <font face="Calibri" color="Black" size="3px">Though we've known each other for quite some time, Swipe and me have recently developed the relationship of "Besties" so obviously he's on here; plus, he's just a really cool guy to hang around.

<font face="Calligraffitti" color="Navyblue" size="5px">Agent Spy <font face="Calibri" color="Black" size="3px">He is on here by request, therefore he shouldn't expect me to write up a good biography for him.

<font face="Calibri" color="Midnightblue" size="3px">If you find yourself under the circumstance of having just read that list, expecting to find yourself on it, and now realized that your name was absent, don't go jump off a cliff yet, there still remains hope! As long as you aren't this one guy here, your aspirations can still flourish and become reality. There are numerous ways for you to express your outrage and indignation at being excluded, and for your consideration I have listed a couple here: Peradventure I am not on chat at the moment, feel free to remonstrate at me in a message on my wall, being sure to make your point quite plainly by using capital letters and marks of exclamation frequently throughout it.

<font face="Calibri" color="Midnightblue" size="3px">If I AM on chat, you have full rights to enter and vociferate your objections at me in a private message, using, as I said before, a manifold amount of capitalization and punctuation.

<font face="Calibri" color="Midnightblue" size="3px">Once you have done either one of these options, I can assure you that I shall read it and take the necessary steps for restitution on my part.

<font face="Calligraffitti" color="Darkslategrey" size="5px">That Which is Admirable <font face="Calibri" color="Black" size="3px">These are, to put it quite simply, a small amount of the vast number of things in this world that are good. I forget at the moment whether or not they are in any kind of order, they probably aren't.

Danbo

<font face="Calibri" color="Black" size="3px">Danbo is a ambrosial little robot, born of a little-known Japanese manga that almost nobody, including me, has ever read. He is well renowned in photography circles and with anyone who admires things that are in any way adorable. He simplistic look of absolute innocence and wonderment are two contributors to his overall charismatic appearance, and, to put it simply, he is the cutest thing ever to walk the face of the earth.

Ginger Ale

<font face="Calibri" color="Steelblue" size="3px">Ginger Ale is one of the few soft drinks I care to ever pour down my throat, along with Dr. Pepper and a few others that I will not bother to mention here. Its simple, tart taste without much sugar is pleasant to the palate and brings tears to the eyes, tears that I can assure you are of joy. I prefer Canada Dry, for the name is rooted in my own heritage, but since nearly all Ginger Ale tastes the same, I don't really give a rip what the brand name you stick on it is.

Hipster Cats

<font face="Calibri" color="Black" size="3px">Hipster cats, adorable little felines clothed in hooded sweatshirts and with their faces adorned with spectacles, are a wonderful example on the Internet gone right. The original artist for the first hipster kitty drawing that eventually turned into the commonly known meme, ranked 24 on memegenerator, described what happened as "the Internet ate a piece of my art and turned it into a ever collaborating beast." The original picture, shown below, was titled "Allison," and since then adorable little cats wearing similar attire have popped up all over the Internet.

Professor Layton

<font face="Calligraffitti" color="Darkslategrey" size="5px">That Which is Intolerable Mountain Dew

<font face="Calibri" color="Midnightblue" size="3px">Some people on here like that despicable drink, Mountain Dew. They somehow enjoy the atrocious sensation of the disgustingly sweet liquid pouring down their miserable, crystallized throats. I am not one of those people. My own daughter drinks it on occasion, mingled with an equal portion of root beer. It's certainly not a habit I would condone, but it goes back to the very roots of Mountain Dew. As you may or may not know, when Mountain Dew was first created in the 1940's, in Tennessee, it was intended to be mixed with whisky. Small wonder it is so unimaginably sweet, if it was created to be mixed with liquor.



Citrus Scent

<font face="Calibri" color="Black" size="3px">Citrus scent seems to be, according to nearly everyone else out there, what your house ought to smell like. Air fresheners, toilet cleaners and chewing gum all work together to spew the filthy redolence my way. Honestly people, please, will it never stop?

Crayons

<font face="Calibri" color="Midnightblue" size="3px">Crayons are a despicable excuse for an art medium. They leave sloppy, thick, waxy lines that are in no way pleasing to the mind. They break easily, and are a terrific job to sharpen. Although there are supposed to be 133 colours currently in the Crayola line of crayons, anyone who has ever used them can state that there is only brown and purple. Why on earth these things are allowed in schools and among children is beyond me, for it is impossible for a child to ever be creative if he is constantly fighting he instrument he supposed to use. The only good artwork I have ever seen that utilized crayons featured them melted, running down a sheet of paper. I stuck it below.



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<font face="Arial" color="Black" size="1.5px">Warning: Pointless

<font face="Calibri" color="Steelblue" size="3px">This part, the Muddle, is not completed; therefore it may seem devoid of information at the time of your reading. Don't get all into a stew over it, though, Rome wasn't built in a day, and writing a userpage such as mine is at least as arduous a task as building Rome.

<font face="Calligraffitti" color="Darkslategrey" size="5px">The End

<font face="Calibri" color="Black" size="3px">And so now we arrive at the bittersweet (but mostly sweet) end of this rampant literary mess. I trust that you, the reader, have enjoyed the minute moments you spent perusing this page, and if you are in anywise unhappy now over your decision there is absolutely nothing I can do about it.

<font face="Calibri" color="Darkslategrey" size="3px">I do ask one small favour of you though, and that is to please sign the guestbook below. After all, it's not exactly polite of anyone to read through someone's page and then not leave at least their signature, so please do.

<font face="Calligraffitti" color="Darkslategrey" size="3px">Guestbook


 * <span class="LSB-Sig" style="background: saddlebrown;text-shadow: 0 0 5px #4D4DFF;color:white;padding:0em 0.5em;border: solid 3px wheat;"><font style="color: yellow;">L • <font style="color: yellow;">S  • <font style="color: yellow;">B


 * <font color="#ffdb66" style="text-shadow: 0.1em 0.05em #333;">General <font color="#c0d6e4" style="text-shadow: 0.1em 0.05em #333;">Obadiah  <font color="#f8e4e7" style="text-shadow: 0.1em 0.05em #333;">Langton


 * -Harold89 (talk)


 * ◀ ℳ ▶ (talk) 17:26, December 27, 2013 (UTC)


 * LEGOSuperDKong My Wall 01:56, February 13, 2014 (UTC)




 * Totally wasn't here.
 * Vegeta's Fangirl 02:00, March 16, 2014 (UTC)

<font face="Calligraffitti" color="Darkslategrey" size="5px">The Small Print <font face="Calibri" color="Black" size="1px">This small print, be it written either in a small or a large typeface, is intended to accurately portray the writer and holder of this page's rights to any and all of the content found on this page. The user Loney 97 can in no way be credited with any of the above images that do not bare his signature. All images and/or fanart and/or gifs, memes or other images used for either humour and/or decoration are strictly credited to the original artists and the user Loney 97 is merely using them for various reasons, either specified or unspecified. All the above text is credited to Loney 97, and any of it may be used with either written or verbal permission by Loney 97, regardless of height, weight, race or eye colour. Any participation of polls found on this page or on adjoining links is strictly for the collection of important and/or unimportant data purely for the enjoyment of various unspecified parties. No user is meant to feel any obligation towards voting, although they are strongly encouraged to do so. All sound or music links and/or clips found on this or any adjoining pages are credited solely to the composer/s, producer/s, and/or musicians, and the user Loney in no way made/performed/recorded the specified song or clip of sound, nor has intended to receive any recognition for it. This page is meant to resemble a living person, not dead at the time of this writing, though he may possibly be so at the time that you are reading this. This page is rated suitable for most human beings, both living or deceased without any prejudice whatsoever towards gender, race, and/or what type of breakfast cereal you enjoy. this small print is intended to go on for quite a while without holding much particular weight in the content of this page, and the holder of this page would be surprised to hear someone had actually bothered to read all the way to this line, regardless of gender, race and/or what time you go to bed. All quotes by famous and/or infamous persons, living or deceased with absolutely no regard towards race, gender or hair colour are credited solely to the speaker, regardless of the method in which he made the quote, be it verbally or through another medium. The holder of this page in no way owns any of the coding found on this page as he (the owner of the page) simply borrowed it all from various other user pages around and tweaked it to suit his own personal uses, and he would in no way mind you doing the same for various unspecified reasons. Copyright 2014. Most rights reserved.